Two men fight in restaraunt after one of them tries to make love to sandwich

We’re sure you’ve heard of “2 girls 1 cup” but have you heard of “1 man 1 sandwich”? On Monday May 19th 35-year-old Juan Soto was trying to enjoy his meal at restaurant. He just wanted to eat one meal without seeing another man’s weiner. Is that too much to ask for? 

While eating, he noticed David Santera, a man who was fornicating a sandwich close by. Juan asked David to put his penis away. It’s amazing that he managed to do this calmly without vomiting first. 

After refusing to do so while still fornicating the sandwich and staring at a girl behind him, David said “Mind your own business”. Isn’t someone humping a sandwich within my eyesight while I’m trying to enjoy my sandwich my business? 

At this point, Juan Soto snapped and began to attack David Santera. Since Juan Soto initiated the physical confrontation, he was arrested on scene. David Santera, aka the Sandwich Humper was free to leave as he went. Police say this is a result of them not having enough evidence to determine whether he was, or was not, fornicating with a sandwich.



About thatguyowen

Writer, hopeful for the future. Aspiring web entrepreneur and always looking to create the next big thing. @YourStupidNews
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