Man Caught Trying To Have Sex With Tree

Birches be crazy. 

Kenneth Crowder, 41, was arrested for trying to have sex with a tree, and assaulting a police officer.

Kenneth was seen by the local police running naked through a neighborhood, all the while yelling that he was God. It wasn’t long after that he was spotted trying to have sex with a tree.

He just wanted to show his love for Mother Nature.

An officer approached Kenneth, and tried using a taser to subdue him. However, in an act of sheer defiance and to the officer’s horror, Kenneth removed the taser probes from his body and ran at the officer.

According to police, Kenneth stole his badge and tried to stab the officer with the pin. Other officers arrived on scene and helped subdue Kenneth, who now faces charges for assault with a deadly weapon on a law enforcement officer, battery on a law enforcement officer, and resisting arrest with violence.

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About thatguyowen

Writer, hopeful for the future. Aspiring web entrepreneur and always looking to create the next big thing. @YourStupidNews
This entry was posted in For F*cks Sake, Florida and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

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